The Good, The Bad and The Simpsons

Week 3: Top 11 Perform (Movie Week) - 7 November 2020

Last week! Bill snuck in a movie themed routine a week early! HRVY and Maisie carried on being dirty ringahs! A new villain was born, Tropical Lime! And our first results show saw Jacqui and Anton get to be the ignominious first boots, causing a bunch of people on Twitter to LOSE THEIR DAMN MINDS and suggest Anton should be a judge! Tonight! The theme weeks are back, baby! Yes, it’s MOVIECALS week, part 1!

We open with a little skit in which all the pairs go to a drive in movie theatre to watch… a recap of last week. Times really are truly dire in the film industry. Then the show begins properly with a James Bond-themed pro dance. Originally I imagine this was timed to coincide with No Time to Die, then the show must have been rueing its luck when it was delayed, only for Sean Connery to time his death perfectly so the routine could effectively serve as a tribute to him (the opposite of no time to die amirite. Too soon?). Now, I’m no Bond afficionado, having only watched a handful of them, of which Skyfall is the only one I can recall any important details of, so I’m afraid the nods of who was being which Bond are mostly lost on me. Aljaž plays a moody suave Bond, Giovanni plays a moody suave Bond in white and Gorka plays Daniel Craig in speedos, which is probably the only Bond moment that matters to most of our readers. [And at least one of our writers. - Steve] The rest of the pros play an assortment of Bond girls, villains and extras, but most excitingly of all, Johannes plays GRACE JONES as Batman [I think he was being May Day :) - Steve], descending from the ceiling in a MOMENT . Shut it all down, I am dead, he wins. Also Luba drew the short straw and was painted in gold, though Karen’s brown PVC boiler suit and Susan Foreman wig weren’t much better. As for the dancing, it’s mostly looking moody and flying. And then it ends with Bond looking in a mirror and seeing Oti reflected back, what a casting spoiler, give the anti-woke brigade palpitations on the same day their hero loses the US election, you love to see it.

Tess and Claud enter. Daly Dresswatch: Poppy red, very patriotic. What Winkleman’s Wearing: Black sequins. The outfits are fine but their fake tans look like they came straight out of a tin of Ronseal. They tell us that because of the obvious reasons, there’s no traditional studio audience and, instead, the crew are stepping into that role. I’m kind of intrigued as to how that will work alongside them doing their actual jobs (and if that meant the fake tan people were too busy so Tess and Claud were literally painting it on themselves from the tin). Hopefully we’ll learn more on It Takes Two about how they managed it, but also, bless them for that, it can’t have been an easy week behind the scenes. [I'm assuming it was people like the make-up and hair teams, whose job is largely done by the time the show starts? This year, at least. - Steve]

The judges enter: Shirley as a grown-up Wendy Darling, Motsi as a skinned zebra from Madagascar, and Craig as an usher or something, look they at least put him in pastel blue instead of black, it’s a start.

The couples enter: Caroline and Johannes, Max and Dianne, JJ and Amy, Maisie and Gorka, Jason and Luba, Ranvir and Giovanni, Jamie and Karen, HRVY and Janette, Nicola and Katya and Bill and Oti. We’ll come to the outfits as we go to each couple in turn, but some of these people have been done dirrrrrty. The couples do a decent job of jigging along to the theme tune, except Max, who only moves once Dianne has punched him in the (padded) stomach.

Nicola and Katya as a couple of T-birds

Last week they did Couple’s Choice which was an imperceptible mess of Contempowaft and Street Commercial and got the obligatory CC 8s and if you thought we were salty about that last week, the presence of two damn Couple’s Choices on tonight’s roster suggest we’re going to be deploying an extra big box of Maldon.

On to their routine, a jive to ‘Greased Lightning’ and they’ve both been put in bacofoil boiler suits with quiffed hair. Nicola’s hair actually looks great, Katya’s less so. It begins with Nicola descending on a sparkly engine and then it takes a while to get going, not helped by even more faffing about with a prop car. It’s not a great dance, although not as bad as the car crash training footage on ITT suggested it was going to be. In places, Nicola is struggling to keep up and whilst there’s a good (albeit prolonged) bit of tricky armography in the middle, the footwork isn’t as light as in the quickstep and there’s a very awkward bit at the end with Katya going through Nicola’s legs that brings the whole thing almost to a standstill. Nevertheless, Nicola’s giving it plenty in the performance stakes and it’s not an unmitigated disaster, it’s just very average indeed. What I really want to see next from these two is something slow – a rumba or waltz, ideally, because three jumpy up and down dances in a row is getting to feel a bit samey, and I really like Nicola so some versatility will give her a bit more of a story. [Yeah, this just felt very underpowered in every sense - the dancing, the costuming, the choreography, nothing about it was especially memorable. - Steve]

We welcome the singers, who are not namechecked, but I can make out Andrea, Jamie and Tommy amongst the perspex; Dave Arch and the wunnerful orchestra.

With the judges, Shirley praises the partnership and says there were difficult moves but they executed it well. Motsi says she enjoyed it though it got a bit tight in the middle and you could see the nerves. Craig says her free arm lacked energy and Katya agrees. He says the kicks and flicks could have been sharper but she embodied the character well.

In the Clauditorium, Nicola says it’s good to have gone first because now she can just support everyone else. Scores: 6, 7, 6 for a total of 19, which I think is about the most it deserved although Katya is clearly thrown by it. Claudia says ‘something weird’ happens to the scores in week 3. We shall see if that’s foreboding or not.

Terms and Conditions this week come from a very blurry and probably drunk John Cleese who is doing a ‘bit’ where he keeps yawning, for some reason.

Maise and Gorka as Poundland 'Snow Queen Frosty Ilsa' and some bloke

Maisie’s VT focuses on how excited she was to do well last week, but she says she’s struggling with the finesse of this one. Her mum comes in and they’ve cast some other woman in the part presumably because Patsy Palmer couldn’t fly back from America.

They’re dancing an American Smooth to ‘Into the Unknown’ from Frozen 2, which is a curious choice for a few reasons: firstly, going to Frozen 2 when the soundtrack of Frozen is made up of so many stone cold bangers; secondly, this song has a really weird rhythm which doesn’t lend itself to anything other than contempowaft really and thirdly, you want the Strictly singers to tackle this? [No I do not. - Steve] Maisie’s in what looks to be a pink version of Elsa’s Frozen dress rather than the natty coat and leggings combo Elsa actually wears for most of the sequel, and the wig is heavy and ridiculous. She looks like Anna FGS, just make her Anna. It would also give Gorka a clearer role as Hans or Kristoff, or even Olaf, rather than miscellaneous man who isn’t in the film whom he’s actually playing (like the whole POINT of the Frozen films is Elsa don’t need no man FFS). Anyway, there are a lot of pitfalls, is what I’m saying, which might be why it’s in the death slot. They do what they can with a song that’s working against them, and she’s clearly a very good dancer and performer, but you can see that she’s not really into it in the way she was in her previous routines, and the footwork isn’t very clean or smooth. Also, the singers go into battle with that note that defeats even Idina Menzel/Adele Dazeem, and it doesn't end well.

In the light, the dress looks even worse without blue lighting to cover how BARBIE PINK it is. Considering they were going on about how all little girls would love to be Elsa, I can imagine an army of said little girls nitpicking the whole thing. Anyway, Motsi says it felt like two different dances put together (which is largely the fault of the music, I think) but that worked well overall. Craig says the footwork could have been cleaner and smoother and she never brought her feet together, but her arms are amazing and he loved the lifts. Shirley says she’s very capable and talented, but the dress hides a multitude of sins; her upper body is superb but the feet are a problem.

In the Clauditorium Maisie says the comments were probably spot on and she wasn’t aware of what her feet were doing. We then cut to a live interview with her parents, and her dad is also played by an actor. You’d think Sid Owen and Pasty Palmer, as Strictly graduates, would be willing to pop on Zoom for thirty seconds, but no. [Then again I can't imagine either of them has particularly fond memories of their time. - Steve] Also she has a stand-in sister, taking the place of Whitney, who appears to be played by Sonia (pop star Sonia, not her aunt Sonia as played by another Strictly legend, NatCass). Scores: 8, 7, 9 for a total of 24.

Caroline and Johannes as Mama Rose and Louise

This VT is full on luvvie madness with Caroline slow-mo touching the seats in an empty theatre (not pictured: the minions going round after her with disinfectant spray) and talking about her acting career and how lovely and glorious everyone is, and we also meet her daughter Rose, and via video, her husband Sam Farmer, who she always refers to as ‘Sam Farmer’ not Sam because she is Caroline. They are doing musical theatre couple’s choice and if this isn’t ALL the ham, and the eggs, and the chips, I want my money back.

They’re dancing their Couple’s Choice to ‘Everything’s Coming up Roses’ from Gypsy (missed opportunity not to use this for The Simpsons theme as 'Everything's Coming Up Milhouse') and I know every time we recap movies/musicals week there’s the grumble over them being the same thing, but I’m sorry, not one person knows Gypsy the film better than Gypsy the musical and I will die on this hill. Anyway, Caroline’s playing Mama Rose, with a not very subtle undercurrent of ‘Imelda Whonow, you want to cast me’ – I was actually surprised she didn’t sing as well as dance, for that very reason. Johannes seems to be playing Louise which is the kind of gender fuckery I'm here for – Grace Jones and Louise in one night, what a legend, just crown him Queen of everything and have done with it.  The routine itself can’t actually live up to the promise of Caroline going full throttle luvvie, with Johannes slightly overshadowing her throughout. She doesn’t do a bad job, but she isn’t really pushing every movement to its limit and so it feels somewhat subdued, a word that has no place in a description of Caroline doing a musical theatre routine [particularly when she's playing MAMA ROSE - Steve]. There’s a good lift at the end though and her wig is full Bette Midler.

Craig says she set the character up well but it didn’t translate into the dance, as it was too polite and balletic and needed more of the desperation of the character, but he thought the timing was amazing. Shirley says she started extremely well and there could have been more consistent energy but she thinks she’s improving. Motsi says she sees the improvement but there was real power in her voice when she came on doing an acting, and she needs to put the same power into the dancing. Caroline says she’ll take the notes on board if she’s still here next week. In the Clauditorium, Caroline dedicates the dance to everyone in theatre who isn’t able to work at the moment. God I miss theatre. We also get a little VT from her daughter Rose congratulating her for playing a Rose.

Scores: 6, 7, 8 for a total of 21. Craig and Shirley seem to have mislaid their Couple’s Choice 8 paddles and accidentally picked up their regular paddles there.

Jason and Luba as Finn and Rey

Their VT features Jason trying to give Luba a crash course in Star Wars, or at least the original trilogy anyway… despite the fact they’re playing characters from the sequel trilogy. Poor Luba.

They’re dancing the Paso to the theme from Star Wars and it opens with a bit of capering about with lightsabers, though nothing to rival Kellie and Kevin’s Charleston, then it’s into the dance proper. He’s pretty wooden throughout, and his posture generally isn’t great either, but you can see in his face that he’s trying. Then there’s a bit where he slings her through his legs and briefly forgets what to do afterwards, so overall it’s a bit like a boy playing dress up which… it’s a big boy playing dress up, so what else did we expect?

Shirley says she liked the knee walks but didn’t find the character of the paso in it, he has a nice smile but the understated strength of paso was missing. Motsi says she can feel his motivation and  energy but that he needs to take time to understand the intention of the movement because then he might understand it better (is it me, or are Motsi’s critiques way more useful this year than last?). [Not just you, she can still be a bit vague sometimes but I've seen an improvement too - Steve] Craig said it felt a bit by numbers as he was going from position to position and missing the Spanish lines and fluidity. We get a video from his friend Osi. Is Nicola the only one not to get a supporters’ VT? Or did I blink and miss hers?

Scores: 3 (OOF), 4, 5 for a total of 12. I mean it wasn’t good, but I don’t know that it was a 3, bless him.

JJ and Amy as Butch Cassidy and... presumably Etta Place?

Their VT sees them going back to the Olympic Park and showing us that he won a gold medal. I’m a bit worried that they’ve used up all his sentimental VT storylines already, what are they going to do when it comes to Couple’s Choice?

They’re dancing a foxtrot to ‘Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head’ from Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, one of the three films used tonight that I haven’t seen (the others being The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, and Gnomeo and Juliet obviously). This is a very sweet routine – there aren’t many gimmicks to it other than starting and ending by sitting on a bicycle, which I assume is something to do with the film. He’s really performing well as the charming lead and he has neat footwork, other than a sloppy bit at the end. It’s a world away from Amy chucking everything at Karim last year, but in a good way.

Motsi says when he came in he was timid but now she sees his leading with a gentleness and he’s taking huge steps. Craig says the timing went out at the end, but it was quiet and understated and he can’t believe JJ can dance like that. Shirley stands and claps and says it’s the first dance where he started to understand the importance of footwork and she’s very pleased. In the Clauditorium, he is also denied a friends and family call (spoiler: no-one else gets one from this point on, which makes them having three in a row very weird indeed). Scores: 8, 8, 8 for a total of 24. Claudia calls it the highest foxtrot of the series, as if there are many others to compare it to.

HRVY and Janette as Gnomeo and Juliet

They go and sit in an empty cinema (God I miss cinema) [oh god, me too. I miss everything. I even found myself missing THE GYM this week, what has become of me - Steve] where Harvey bitches about having to do Gnomeo and Juliet and Janette tries to sell it with an ‘er, the animation’s good?’

And so to ‘what nonsense are they dressing Janette up in this year’ – and she actually gets off lightly compared to Trolls and Pokemon: there’s no full body makeup for one thing. HRVY has a white beard and they both have silly gnome hats but it’s not as ugly as I’d have feared (possibly because what they’ve done to Max and Dianne makes this pale in comparison). The dancing itself is mostly watchable, he is a mega ringer after all, but there are a couple of stumbles in places and he’s very bent-legged rather than straight-legged.

Craig says it looked a bit awkward on him and he didn’t see enough basic cha cha cha, but he thought the spotting and storytelling were great. Shirley says he’s super cool (?!) but there wasn’t enough cha cha cha content or footwork. Motsi says she likes them but he needs to be more coordinated from top to bottom and to have more cha cha cha in there. Traditional cha cha cha deramping for a male ringer, every year, like clockwork. Come the final this will be his ‘nightmare’ week.

In the Clauditorium, Janette says it was difficult to balance how much cha cha cha to put in given the movie week theme. Sure Janette. Scores: 6, 7, 8 for a total of 24.

Ranvir and Giovanni as Deena and Jimmy

Ranvir says they’re dancing to ‘Dreamgirls’, which they aren’t, they’re dancing to one of the songs from the musical... I mean film... rather than the theme itself. Anyway. Her VT sees her going up in a Spitfire for some GMB thing or other, I dunno, Remembrance Day I guess.

They are dancing a foxtrot to ‘Love You I Do’ and just like Aljaž is the king of the lovely waltz, and Kevin was the king of paso, Giovanni is staking his claim to be the best at foxtrot (Anton du Beke’s face, I’d love to see it). Proving his routine with Michelle last year wasn’t a fluke, this is a lovely routine and Ranvir really has charisma (and a dreadful Helen Shapiro wig but the dress is lovely so you win some you lose some). The chemistry between them is delightful – there’s a little nose rub and they sing at each other, which is adorable. Occasionally her arm jerks up a bit but otherwise there’s little to fault here – she’s the unexpected treat of this series.

Motsi gives it a standing ovation and the audience whoop really loudly. Shirley praises the constant contact and calls it so simple and beautiful it was breathtaking; she just loved the quality of the piece. Motsi says it’s national foxtrot day, and she sees the two of them complementing each other well, and she loved them embodying the dance. Craig says Motsi’s turned into Bruno with all her gesticulating, and he gives it a FAB-YOO-LUS because this dance was pure Craig-bait, let’s face it.

In the Clauditorium we learn that Ranvir’s ballet teacher once wrote a report with the word ‘elephant’ in it. Ooh, stealth dirty ringah. Scores: 9 (!!), 9, 9 for a total of 27. (It’s so weird not writing 36 for a 9ed routine).

Jamie and Karen as Hercules and a Muse

In the VT, Jamie says it’s uncanny how much he looks like Hercules and he’s willing to go full topless for the votes. God, I love how much of a dork he is. [Me too! His personality is so much more enjoyable than it looked like it was going to be on last year's launch show. - Steve] He puts on a padded chest suit and reduces Karen to laughs because we all know how much she loves a dad joke.

They’re dancing to ‘From Zero to Hero’ and Jamie’s outfit is hilarious – he isn’t topless (that’s reserved for HANKS only) but in a glittery brown dad vest, and a gold skirt, with a gold headband, a long curly ginger wig and a blue cape. It’s amazing. Karen’s in a white dress and a wig that looks like a load of mini rolls glued together. They open with a bit of augmented reality of Hercules derpily knocking down a load of columns and the camera then cuts too late so we see the effect vanish clumsily, but as the whole vibe of this routine is ‘uh-oh spaghettios’ it could be deliberate (sidebar: if anyone this series had to do The Simpsons it should have been either these two or Bill and Oti – Bill as Comic Book Guy, obviously). It’s very silly and the OTT daft humour suits his personality well. The dancing is a mixed bag – there are some nice side by side moments, but there’s also a bit where he clearly biffs doing a leapfrog over Karen. It’s endearing as heck though. Also: Tess has LOST HER SHIT and can’t stop laughing at it all throughout the judging. Broken Tess is my favourite flavour Tess so give these two extra points for that, please. [I really enjoyed this routine! It was sloppy as hell but they were just both so darn charming I didn't care. - Steve]

Motsi calls it a great comeback, Craig says it was more Farrah Fawcett than Herculean (he clearly hasn’t seen the film because that's kind of the point that he starts out as a daft old himbo) and Jamie could have loosened up a bit more in the swivel but it made him laugh a lot. Shirley says it was a massive improvement on last week. Everyone laughs some more and Tess dashes off stage to compose herself.  Hee.

In the Clauditorium, Jamie says it was the fastest thing anyone’s ever done. Claudia mentions the hair, makeup and costume team – wise to get that in before Max and Dianne. Scores: 7, 8, 8 for a total of 23 and I mean probably not, but I’m not going to begrudge them it for entertainment value alone.

Clara and Aljaž as Satine-wearing-Christine-Aguilera’s-corset and Harold Zidler

Tess is still giggling as she introduces them. Their VT sees them being a little disappointed but resolute after last week and laughing a lot about having to be sexy (again) this week. They’re doing a Tango to ‘Lady Marmalade’ from Moulin Rouge and Clara descends on a big heart wearing a sparkly red basque and a frilly black skirt, whilst Aljaž plays a sexy Jim Broadbent. She’s very good at embodying the sultry energy, and having more fun than we’d usually see in a tango. It’s very enjoyable to watch, but I wouldn’t call it exactly staccato and precise in the movement. I suspect they’ve emphasised the fun parts more than doing a straight tango because of having such a serious vampy routine last week but not sure it feels very genre-pure. [I think the music didn't help either. - Steve]

Craig says her frame has really improved but he isn’t sure about having disco elements competing with the tango and he’s a bit conflicted, but overall he really liked it. Shirley says she has exactly the same note as Craig but was less keen on it. However, she thinks Clara has a great frame, but the movements need more finesse and she thinks Clara’s likely to be better in Latin where she can let it all go. Motsi says her energy is great but she needs to control and direct that power a bit more rather than just letting it go everywhere.

Aljaž is very excitable as they bound up to the Clauditorium and Clara says it was all her teenage pop video dreams come true. She also has a jewel right between her breasts and I can’t work out if it’s deliberate or not. Scores: 7, 6, 7 for a total of 20.

Claudia promotes the socials: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Farmville, Animal Crossing and even the official website. 

Max and Dianne as Homer and Marge (Tracy Ullman Show era)

In the VT, Max says he doesn’t understand how they’re going to dance to the Simpsons theme tune. Me neither, unless it’s a Charleston. His special Couple’s Choice sob story VT is about him loving singing, then joining a boy band and becoming famous, and also loving his family, friends and girlfriend. He also has a nan. It’s not the most EMOSH JOURNEE of these things but Max doesn’t strike me as a very gushy guy.

And so. This. Firstly, if we’re going into TV theme tune land, then do it, I’m all for it, there’s loads of good ones out there, bring it on. But to call it movie week is a streeetch, especially if you’re not invoking anything iconically from The Simpsons movie (i.e. spider pig or the dome). Their makeup and outfits are awful – she looks like someone attempting and failing to recreate Crystal Methyd’s Bert’n’Ernie outfits from Drag Race, and he looks like someone put a cushion up his top and said ‘will this do?’. He looks literally nothing like Homer, and without the (terrible) blue wig you wouldn’t know she was Marge. [Yeah, the whole look was very those off-brand "Supportive Cartoon Wife" costumes they sell on Amazon, wasn't it? - Steve] And this dance is supposed to be ‘Street Commercial’ but even by this show’s ever loosening boundaries on what Couple’s Choice is, it doesn’t look like much of anything. Admittedly it starts out not too bad, because it looks like a Charleston, which it should have been. But then it descends into fever dream madness. There’s pratfalls, inflatable donut slinging and a truly nonsensical bit where he humps her feet. For far too long. Dianne’s ugly blue granny pants are on show the whole time, they sit on a sofa for ages (Ben Cohen shout out). I just don’t understand why anyone thought making the closest thing this series has to a HANK look like THAT and do that routine was a good idea, and just kill Couple’s Choice now, with fire, it’s done, it’s over, I’m out.

Tess is nowhere near as amused as she was with Jamie. Shirley says she loves the Simpsons and it was a big change for Max. Well, yeah, but that’s damning with faint praise if there ever was any. Motsi says it was a challenging routine and he made it look easy. Craig said it was risky and people are either going to love or hate it, and he loved it. Has Bruno left his cocaine stash under Craig’s desk?

In the Clauditorium, Max looks bewildered and we can see his hand is strapped up, and it’s weird no-one mentioned that, given how much this show loves an injury porn. [I think it's been strapped up for most of the series, hasn't it? He frequently seems to have some sort of wrist support on in training. - Steve] Scores: 8, 8, 8 for a total of 24. Of course.

Bill and Oti as Il Brutto and Il Buono

[I totally read that as "Il Brutto and Il Bruno", btw - Steve]

Their VT sees them telling us they’re playing the ‘good’ and ‘bad’ from The Good, The Bad and the Ugly, and is that two cowboy films in one movie week? On American Election results day? Sure.

They’re doing a paso to the film’s theme and they’re dressed in their best Cowboy garb (Oti’s outfit seems to be a blend of Cowboy and Native American Stereotype) and…. I’m not really sure how I feel about this routine? It’s clearly been given the pimp slot because of the drama but for me it doesn’t live up to their dance last week (which should have been used this week) nor to Ranvir’s foxtrot. It’s often hard with a Paso to tell how much it’s leaning into comedy because it’s so OTT but it’s really hard here – I don’t know if they’re playing it for laughs or not. It’s pouty but not quite hammy enough to be clearly done for laughs. It’s energetic, and the dancing isn’t bad, but his shaping is also not quite right for me - he looks like one of those bendy bananas the Brexiteers think the EU banned - and there’s faffing about in the middle with a guitar that makes me come over all Len Goodman. I like Bill, but I think the show’s leaning into him being a contender a bit too hard at the moment, because although last week was a bona fide triumph, this… not so much.

Motsi says his vibe is ‘I’m not here to play, I’m here to paso’ and she praises his eyes and focus, calling it a ‘movie week highlight’. Craig says if he keeps going like this they’ll be seeing him in the final. Shirley says it had everything, it had drama, sensuality, great arms and he’s ‘extraordinarily fantastic’. In the Clauditorium, we’re reminded about Oti being strict. Scores: 8, 9, 9 for a total of 26.

The vote opens to Bill and Oti dancing like loons and breaking Claudia in the process. Both hosts reduced to giggling messes in one week without a single Claudia gag? Nice work everyone.

Leaderboard:

1. Ranvir and Giovanni - 27
2. Bill and Oti - 26
3=. Maisie and Gorka - 24
3=. JJ and Amy - 24
3=. Max and Dianne - 24
6. Jamie and Karen - 23
7=. Caroline and Johannes - 21
7=. HRVY and Janette - 21
9. Clara and Aljaž - 20
10. Nicola and Katya - 19
11. Jason and Luba - 12

A very weird leaderboard for what’s been quite a weird evening. I can’t see Jason escaping the dance-off but there are a lot of people who could be joining him. Surprisingly HRVY’s about to have his first big test and he could be a shock bottom two joiner, but given all the ties, I’d say anyone other than Ranvir and Bill should hope they have good support. And Clara and Nicola might be in danger given the GBP’s lack of support for black women. Still, we’ll find out soon enough who will send Jason home – or, if by some miracle, he survives the public vote - who will be the first SHOCK!BOOT! Join me then.