This week on It Takes Two, we have learnt...

- Dan still really doesn't get it.
- Katya basically thinks Dan got kicked off for not being famous enough, and also doesn't seem to really rate Anton. Katya <3
- Craig thinks it would be "complete carnage" if people just ignored the rules regarding when lifts can and cannot be done. YES IMAGINE WHAT THAT MIGHT BE LIKE.
- Holly would like to kill Artem in her choreography every week.
- Pamela Stephenson is still full of shit, God love her.
- Nancy is hoping to never see Claudia again. You know, in the bottom two. She's probably still on for any social engagements.
- Repetition in choreography is fine, as long as you don't repeat the same steps four times.
- Even Karen Hardy thinks the foxtrot is boring. I FEEL SO VINDICATED RIGHT NOW.
- Alex has trouble discerning the difference between "step" and "goosestep".
- The fashion strand is still indescribably boring. NO1 CURR.
- Brendan thinks the judges should've knocked more marks off for that illegal rumba.
- No one's rehearsal footage is looking terribly encouraging.
- Russell will be taking a passive role in parts of Saturday's dance and acting the lady while Flavia leads. JESUS FUCKING WEPT.
- The choreography for Harry's jive just looks worse every time I see it. Seriously, Aliona's not so much phoning it as posting it on the Digital Spy forums. From Cuba. Via dial-up.
- Harry prepared for Strictly by doing lots of swimming and running. WHERE WERE THE CAMERAS WHEN HE WAS ALL WET AND/OR SWEATY, EH?
- Jennifer Grey (boo hoo, boo hoo, etc) will be sitting in for Len on the 5th and 6th November. This officially ruins all of my plans for Head Judge Katya Virshilas.
- Harry's still waving his drumsticks around in rehearsals. (He can wave my drumstick around in rehearsals any day, etc etc.)
- When Ola and Robbie danced at halftime in a football game this week, she went wrong.
- Shaving his hair is not an option for Robbie because he has a big nose.
- James has requested a catsuit for Alex this week, and Pasha has requested an air hostess-style outfit for Chelsee. Intriguing.
- Russell gets overexcited when he visits the costume department. Try to look surprised.
- Kristina's last words to Jason before his tango were "elbows, chin and timing - don't rush".
- Brendan thinks the samba suits Bloody Lulu's personality. This is because it stands for Scottish And Mightily Bloody Annoying.
- Robin and Anita have got big exciting lifts planned for Saturday. Whether this is just how they're getting to the studio remains unconfirmed.
- Chelsee's bump on the head came when she and Harry sneaked off the set when they weren't supposed to and she wasn't looking where she was going. They had to change her hairdo to hide the wound.
- Chelsee got into trouble at school sometimes for talking too much and not paying attention. Again, try to look surprised.
- While Anton and Nancy were getting their scores from the judges on Saturday, Robbie was stood behind them practising his hold and his steps. Bless.
- Tamzin Outhwaite refers to Tom Ellis as "the John Cleese of the dancefloor" - so, Tom Ellis for Strictly 2012, are we all agreed?
- Rory and Erin have got "Team RoBo" t-shirts made up with "Elegance and Panache" on the back. Presumably those are their crimefighting secret identities.