Saturday, 24 November 2012

This week on It Takes Two, we have learnt...

- Yellow is not Richard's colour.
- Pasha's nipples have their own make-up artist
- The Strictly  hairdressers are possessive enough to put their names on their crimpers.
- Natalie was brought to tears by the prospect of WEMBLEY.  So were we, Natalie. So were we.
- Richard is the most tactile man Erin's ever met.  We had noticed.
- Craig's marking is relative to the quality of the series, rather than the quality of the dahnce and he only gave Chris Hollins a 10 for his Charleston because series 7 was rubbish.
- Natalie gets embarrassed when she sees herself on TV. Don't worry about it, Natalie: you're amazing, we promise.
- Zoe thinks the Dread Dance-Off is horrid and should be ignored. Guys, she's ONE OF US!
- Karen Hauer isn't entirely sure how to spell "Elvis".
- Vincent pretending that he doesn't understand English idioms is starting to get REALLY annoying.
- Zoe does not want anyone to steal the title of "highest-scoring samba" away from her.
- Victoria wasn't bothered by being dangled from a great height in her paso, but she was a bit concerned about getting properly untangled from her harness.
- Victoria has lost 11lbs of muscle mass over the course of the show - particularly from her legs.
- Robbie Williams is one of Brendan’s heroes
- James does a very cruel (but quite funny) impression of Anton.  His Artem and Vincent are OK too – at any rate, he’s better than John Culshaw.
- Michael and Natalie have been training in Darren and Lilia’s dance school in Sheffield.  For some reason they didn’t invite your Sheffield-based SCB correspondent to watch.
- Denise has three arms.  The sign of a RINGER!
- Zoe doesn't appear to know the difference between a salsa and a samba either, despite being the (joint) BEST-EVER at the latter.
- Ian and Zoe both struggle with the charleston swivel, so let's all be grateful it was never a part of series three.
- Denise's left tit fell out in the dress rehearsal for her charleston. Bit disappointed that didn't make Len's Lens.
- Vincent can really work a pair of sparkly heels.
- Pasha has taken to saying "go on my son". Not sure about this development at all.
- Zoe did the splits on the Strictly tour 43 times and now she's got a dicky hip.
- Louis is struggling with being the man and Lisa with being the woman.  Damn Strictly and its Cissexism!  Trans agenda 2013 FTW!
- Kimberley is too sweet for the Tango.
- Nicky is worried about the technical parts of the Charleston.  Don’t worry, Nicky, Craig gave Denise a 9 because hers was too good for a 10.
- Karen Hauer doesn’t want to get dropped.  In other news, Katya is BACK for the Christmas special.
- The dance of love and sex is now the dance of farmyard… yes, Lisa and Robin are having LOLS about the rumba.
- We should all be very grateful we’ve never had to see Karen Hardy’s Charleston.
- Wardrobe lady Vicky will never recover from Wembley.  Us neither.
- Russell Grant thinks seven years of Strictly has aged Vincent beyond all recognition.  MIAOW!
- The charleston as we know it today is based upon the choreography for the 1923 musical Running Wild.
- Kimberley has trained the fewest hours again this week. Either she's really busy with Girls Aloud stuff or she's just kind of over it now. Possibly both.
- Ricky Whittle has the most 10s of anyone in Strictly history. Harry Judd is the winner with the most 10s (second place overall), series 6 was the series where the most tens were awarded, Bruno is the judge who has awarded the most tens, and Louisa Lytton got the earliest ten of any series (for her jive in week three)
- Kimberley now has a dodgy hip to go with her dodgy knee.
- This week, a madigascan lemur predicted Denise and James to top the leaderboard.
- Karen Hauer has an obsession with odd numbers, has a 7 tattoo on her wrist and has to get up at 7:53 am.
- Flavia doesn’t know how you can call Louis’ gymnastic skills tacky and then kind of undermines her point by saying they did it especially for Wembley.
- If Louis makes the final, he wants to do a moonwalk in his showdance.
- It’s not nice to say goodbye to couples.
- FINALLY someone's doing a charleston to 'Doop' by Doop. It's only taken four years.


Katy Boyer said...

NO! I wanted to do the Charleston to Doop! Damn them... I will not repeat a song.

*and back to reality*

Nicky needn't worry about getting the technical bits in the charleston right, as Len has already shouted, there is no technical aspect to it...

skitterywinter said...

I totally LOVE the fact that Craig has only awarded 24 '10s' in the entire history of 'Strictly' as opposed to Len's 70something!

Rad said...

So unsurprised Bruno awarded the most though.

Has anyone Charlestoned to Mama Do the Hump? That seems ripe for it

Katy Boyer said...

Vincent and Dani did a salsa(?) to Mama do the Hump earlier this year.
Surely they wouldn't dare affront the sanctity of the dahnce and use it for two genres?