Saturday, 15 November 2014

This week on It Takes Two, we have learnt...

- Kevin thinks the one week you don't want to go out is pre-BLACKPOOL week, but no-one else seems that bothered.
- Craig giving positive comments to Simon has boosted his confidence, BUT NOT THAT MUCH, less you think he's a CONFIDENT MONSTER.
- Kristina talks to herself a lot.
- The only two pros who’ve ever earned 40 for an Argentine tango are Aliona (with Harry) and Kristina (with Jason).
- The competition question about how many 10s Abbey and Aljaž got last year omits the correct option: D) Too many, FUCKINGDISCOSALSAABOMINATION
- Craig thinks Pixie and Jake are the ones to beat this series.
- The scores are getting lower because the judges are being more mean.  Instead of just, you know, saving high scores until they're merited.  God, they wouldn't pass a QAA inspection for their marking.
- Craig thinks Judy will leave this week.
- Dancing is hard for people with dance training, according to Craig.  
- Craig gave Mark an extra point because Mark gave Craig one of his calendars. ACTUAL BRIBERY SCANDAL.
- Craig went off on the wrong foot on the Thriller dance, and he is happy for us to go back and check it on iPlayer.
- Alison loved her charleston outfit because black is slimming.
- If Alison had made it to BLACKPOOL she would have been dancing to ‘It’s Raining Men’. This is my most-mourned non-dance since Thom’s topless vampire Hallowe’en paso that never was. :(
- Alison wants Jake to win.
- Zoe has vowed to avoid people's mums from now on because of the curse of the mummies.
- Pasha squeezes you extra hard when you’re in the bottom two.
- Pasha will teach you how to do body ripples, but only on a private one-to-one basis. WHERE DO WE SIGN UP?
- BLACKPOOL Tower Ballroom was in huge demand for dancing even during the two world wars.
- Soldiers billeted in BLACKPOOL practising their drills in the ballroom, and it was also used for sewing parachutes in.
- Zoe's grandparents used to dance in the BLACKPOOL tower ballroom.
- Karen Hauer thinks that the quickstep is the first dance where Mark started believing in himself. But not too much, still so humble, can’t quite believe he’s made it this far etc.
- Karen Hardy has been whale-watching in Benidorm.
- Natalie thinks you can teach anyone to dance - but to what level of ability is another question.
- Jake didn’t really enjoy the rumba. It was quite uncomfortable.
- Aljaž has been teaching Jake how to do the swing-and-sway. They make a very cute couple.
- Pixie finds Darcey very inspiring because she’s so classy and elegant.
- Pixie and Trent are going to be Roman gladiators for their paso. Trent made himself a little costume at home, because of course he did.
- Trent's idea of Britishness is a couple called Pat'n'Marge.  Whether Pat is male or female is unspecified but perhaps it's a name thing, rather than a gender thing.
- Trent has danced at BLACKPOOL many times, but not since he was fifteen.
- Aliona is off somewhere on a secret mission for the Christmas special. Has she scored herself another free holiday to Florida?
- Trent and Aliona managed 39 New Yorkers in the pro challenge but incurred three penalties, which puts them on 36, two points behind Pasha and Natalie.
- The pros under-dance to make their partners look better.  At least that's Anton's excuse for his Latin.
- Anton is concerned that he’s running out of body parts to throw Judy around by.
- Anton broke Judy in nice and slowly.  THANKS ZOE FOR RUINING MY BRAIN.
- This time of year is good for gulls in BLACKPOOL.
- Sunetra swallowed two halfpenny coins when she was little. Shame they weren’t Jill Halfpenny coins, then her Latin might’ve been a bit better. (Thank you, we’ll be here all week.)
- Robin’s back has recovered enough for him to teach some teachers how to dance in a special ITT segment.
- As per usual, he’s choreographed a routine that’s well beyond the level of his students.
- One of the teachers is a dead ringer for Sonya from Neighbours.
- Lisa Riley still won’t go away.
- Everything in BLACKPOOL can look really small if you’re not good at it. *eyebrow*
- Kevin’s parents critique his dancing every week.
- Wayne Bridge has also started critiquing Kevin’s dancing based on the rehearsal footage on It Takes Two. Poor Kevin just can’t catch a break.
- Zoe is loving the prevalence of late 70s and early 80s music this series.
- It takes over 350 people to get Strictly to BLACKPOOL but Sunetra and Steve still had to share an earpiece when reporting from there. (Mark and Judy, on the other hand, got one each)
- One of the backstage Strictly crew looks like Andrea from X Factor.
- The BLACKPOOL props are going to be bigger than ever.  Surely that should have been their approach for the cavern that was WEMBLEY.
- Zoe thinks cameramen do lunges to warm up.
- Sunetra calls the Clauditorium/Ballcony/Ball pool the 'where we hang out area'.  Our names are catchier.
- Taxi drivers love the Ball.

- Iveta hosting a backstage segment is a thing that is AMAZING and must happen regularly.
- Iveta calls Vicky Gill 'Dicky'.  The very shade of it.
- Iveta's "sincere listening" face is basically Phoebe Buffay.
- You only notice the BLACKPOOL floor bouncing when lots of people are on it.
- Linda Robson thought Zoe won her series.
- Gareth Malone doesn't think Sunetra is very snappy; Linda Robson doesn't think she will win.
- Gareth Malone's All Star Band did their worst ever rendition on the day they recorded their single.  WAY TO SELL YOURSELVES.
- Gareth Malone doesn't think Mark is a natural performer but Larry Lamb thinks he has the blip bloop needed.
- Pixie and Trent are dancing to the Eve of War from War of the Worlds, the soundtrack of which used to play in the Cleethorpes (which is not Grimsby despite how much this show tries to claim it is) lazer zone, The Labyrinth of Doralia.
- Pixie went to stage school (RINGER) with Linda Robson's school.
- Larry Lamb thinks Steve isn't in the right mileu and he makes Gareth Malone hide behind the sofa.
- Gareth Malone thinks 'Julie' will be leaving, whoever she is.  Linda Robson and Larry Lamb think Judy.
-  Zoe apologised to Julie for them all thinking she would leave.


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